The Atlantic Monthly, October 1994
The Failure of Sex Education
"Comprehensive sex
education," mandated in seventeen states, is the educational fad of
the hour, yet there is little evidence that it
"works"--prevents teenage pregnancy and stanches the spread of
sexually transmitted disease. Defended by its professional-class
originators as "getting real" about teenage sex, it fails to
speak to the grim reality of what the author calls "the new sexual
revolution" among the young
by Barbara Dafoe Whitehead
[Also see the transcript of an online
conference in which Whitehead discusses this article.]
Amid rising concern about the hazards of
teenage sex, health and school leaders are calling for an expanded
effort to teach sex education in the schools. At the moment the favored
approach is called comprehensive sex education. The nation's highest
ranking health officer, Surgeon General Joycelyn Elders, has endorsed
this approach as the chief way to reduce unwed childbearing and sexually
transmitted diseases (STDs) among teenagers. The pillars of the health
and school establishments, including the National Association of School
Psychologists, the American Medical Association, the National School
Boards Association, and the Society for Adolescent Medicine, support
this approach. So do a growing number of state legislatures. Over the
past decade seventeen states have adopted mandates to teach
comprehensive sex education, and thirty more support it.
Sex education in the schools is not new, of course, but never before
has it attempted to expose children to so much so soon. Comprehensive
sex education includes much more than a movie about menstruation and a
class or two in human reproduction. It begins in kindergarten and
continues into high school. It sweeps across disciplines, taking up the
biology of reproduction, the psychology of relationships, the sociology
of the family, and the sexology of masturbation and massage. It seeks
not simply to reduce health risks to teenagers but also to build self
esteem, prevent sexual abuse, promote respect for all kinds of families,
and make little boys more nurturant and little girls more assertive. As
Dr. Elders explains, comprehensive sex education is not just about
giving children a "plumbing lesson."
This approach is appealing for several reasons. First, it reaches the
vast majority of American schoolchildren, through the public school
system. Second, it is inexpensive. Principals have to do little more
than buy a sex-education curriculum and enroll the coach or
home-economics teacher in a training workshop, and their school has a
sex-education program. Third, to panicky parents, worried about their
ability to protect their children from AIDS and other STDs,
comprehensive sex education offers a reassuring message: The schools
will teach your children how to protect themselves.
Nonetheless, comprehensive sex education has provoked vigorous
opposition, both at the grass roots and especially in the organized
ranks of the religious right. Its critics argue that when it comes to
teaching children about sex, the public schools should convey one
message only: abstinence. In response, sex educators point to the
statistics. Face facts, they say. A growing number of teenagers are
engaging in sex and suffering its harmful consequences. It is foolish,
if not irresponsible, to deny that reality. If more teenagers are
sexually active, why deprive them of the information they need to avoid
early pregnancy and disease? What's more, why insist on a standard of
conduct for teenagers that adults themselves no longer honor or obey? As
usual, the Surgeon General states the basic proposition memorably:
"Everybody in the world is opposed to sex outside of marriage, and
yet everybody does it. I'm saying, 'Get real.'"
This rhetoric is politically shrewd. It is smart to identify sex
education with realism, honesty, and sexual freedom. (Its opponents are
thereby unrealistic, hypocritical, and sexually unliberated.) Similarly,
it is advantageous to link the sex-education campaign with the struggle
against religious fundamentalism and, more generally, with opposition to
religious argument in public life. When the issue is cast in
Scopes-trial terms, it appears that an approach to sex education based
in science will triumph over one rooted in blind faith.
But the sex educators' rhetoric is double-edged. As credentialed
professionals, trained in the health and pedagogical sciences, advocates
for a "reality-based" approach must at some point submit to
reality tests. Their claims raise the inevitable question, How realistic
is their approach to solving the problems associated with teenage sex?
Or, to be more specific, What is the evidence that comprehensive sex
education can achieve its stated goals? Does comprehensive sex education
respond to the real-life circumstances of teenagers today? Does the new
sex pedagogy take into account the realities of teenage sex in the
1990s?
The New Jersey Model
A few months ago I set out to answer these questions by venturing
into a state with a long and strong commitment to comprehensive sex
education. Few states have worked harder or longer than New Jersey to
bring sexual enlightenment to schoolchildren. In 1980 the state adopted
one of the nation's first mandates for comprehensive sex education--or
family-life education, as it is called there--and it was the very first
state to require sex education for children in the primary grades. Its
pioneering efforts have earned New Jersey the equivalent of a five-star
rating from the Sex Information and Education Council of the U.S. (SIECUS),
a national advocacy organization that promotes comprehensive sex
education.
Virtually every public school student in New Jersey receives sex
education (the average is twenty-four hours a year), and some
schoolchildren, like those in the Irvington public schools, have an
early and full immersion. Overall, teachers are trained and experienced,
averaging close to ten years of teaching a family-life curriculum.
According to recent opinion polls, public support for sex education
in New Jersey is strong. In one survey an overwhelming majority of
adults said they favored teaching teenagers about sex in school,
including controversial topics such as contraception, homosexuality, and
"safer sex." Slightly more Catholics than Protestants surveyed
favor sex education (88 percent to 84 percent), and support is nearly as
high among parents as among nonparents. Parents tend to be more
knowledgeable about the content of sex-education programs, and a
majority say their school's offerings are excellent or good. Another
survey, conducted by Rutgers University's Eagleton Institute, found that
61 percent of parents with school-age children say they would permit
their child to get condoms from the schools.
Politically, therefore, sex education has been an all-but-unqualified
success in New Jersey. Since 1980 popular support has steadily
increased, and over that period the state mandate has held up against
repeated legislative challenges, including a recent proposal to stress
sexual abstinence.
The key to this success is a well-organized advocacy effort. A state
mandate alone rarely achieves the goal of comprehensive sex education,
because local school authorities often fail to act vigorously to observe
the mandate. It takes a strong and sustained campaign to win over
parents and teachers, beat back political opponents, and stiffen the
spines of timid school administrators. In New Jersey two closely allied
organizations advance the sex-education cause. Rutgers, the state
university, administers grants and provides office space to the advocacy
campaign. It is, though, the small but ubiquitous New Jersey Network for
Family Life Education that conducts the daily business of winning
support for sex education across the state.
The Philosophy of Sex Education
Susan Wilson runs the Network from her handsome gated home in
Princeton. (The Network is officially headquartered at Rutgers.) Wilson,
who has been an indefatigable crusader for comprehensive sex education
for more than a decade, helped to write and pass the state mandate in
the late 1970s, while she was a member of the State Board of Education.
A few years later she took over as the head of the Network. With a
budget of about $200,000 this year, mostly from foundations and the
state government, Wilson and her small staff publish a newsletter,
testify at hearings, train teachers, develop sex-education materials,
fight efforts to overturn the mandate, and perform the scores of other
duties required in their advocacy work. But Wilson's single most
important task, which she clearly enjoys, is traveling up and down the
state making the case for comprehensive sex education.
Because the case that she makes represents today's
comprehensive-sex-education orthodoxy, it deserves close attention. It
has several tenets. First, children are "sexual from birth."
Like many sex educators, Wilson rejects the classic notion that a
latency period occurs between the ages of about six and twelve, when
children are sexually quiescent. "Ever since I've gotten into this
field, the opponents have used that argument to frighten
policymakers," she says. "But there is a body of developmental
knowledge that says this is not true." And, according to Wilson, it
is not simply that children are born sexual or that their sexuality is
constantly unfolding. It is also that sexuality is much broader than
most imagine: "You are not just being sexual by having intercourse.
You are being sexual when you throw your arms around your grandpa and
give him a hug."
Second, children are sexually miseducated. Unlike Europeans, who
learn about sex as matter-of-factly as they learn about brushing their
teeth, American children grow up sexually absurd--caught between
opposing but equally distorted views of sex. One kind of distortion
comes from parents. Instead of affirming the child's sexuality, parents
convey the message that sex is harmful, shameful, or sinful. Or, out of
a misguided protectiveness, they cling to the notion of childhood
innocence and fail to provide timely or accurate information about sex.
The second kind of distortion comes from those who would make sex into a
commodity. While parents withhold information, the media and the
marketplace spew sexual misinformation. It is this peculiar American
combination of repressiveness and permissiveness that leads to sexual
wrong thinking and poor sexual decision-making, and thus to high rates
of teenage pregnancy and STDs.
Third, if miseducation is the problem, then sex education is the
solution. Since parents are failing miserably at the task, it is time to
turn the job over to the schools. Schools occupy a safe middle ground
between Mom and MTV. They are places where "trusted adults"
can teach children how to protect themselves against the hazards of sex
and sexual abuse.
Moreover, unlike homes, schools do not burden children with moral
strictures. As Wilson explains, schools can resolve the "conflict
between morality and reality" by offering unbiased statements of
fact. Here, for example, is how a teacher might handle the subject of
masturbation in a factually accurate way: "Some people think it is
okay to masturbate and some people think it is not okay to masturbate,
but most people think that no harm comes to you if you masturbate."
Consequently, when it comes to sex, schools rather than homes offer a
haven in the heartless world.
A fourth and defining tenet is that sex education must begin in the
earliest grades. Like math or reading, comprehensive sex education takes
a "building blocks" approach that moves from basic facts to
more sophisticated concepts, from simple skills to more complex
competencies. Just as it would be unthinkable to withhold math education
until the sixth grade, so, too, is it unwise to delay the introduction
of sex education until the eighth grade.
In the beginning, before there is sex, there is sex literacy. Just as
boys and girls learn their number facts in the first grade, they acquire
the basic sex vocabulary, starting with the proper names for genitalia
and progressing toward an understanding of masturbation, intercourse,
and contraception. As they gain fluency and ease in talking about sexual
matters, students become more comfortable with their own sexuality and
more skillful in communicating their feelings and desires. Boys and
girls can chat with one another about sex, and children can confide in
adults without embarrassment.
Early sex education readies grade school children for the onslaught
of puberty. By the time they reach adolescence, they are cognitively as
well as biologically primed for sex. Moreover, with early sex training,
teenagers are much more likely to engage in what Wilson and her
colleagues consider responsible sexual conduct: abstinence, noncoital
sex, or coitus with a condom. Since abstinence will not lead to
pregnancy or STDs, and noncoital and protected sex are not likely to do
so, comprehensive sex education will help to reduce the incidence of
these problems among teenagers.
This is the philosophy of comprehensive sex education. But how to
translate it into lessons for little children? Although the state
mandate allowed school districts to shop around for a suitable
curriculum, at first not much was available for primary schoolers. Most
teachers had to improvise a curriculum or adapt higher-grade-level texts
to the early grades. What was missing was a standard text: a Dick and
Jane reader for the Michaels and Ashleys of the post-sexual-revolution
generation.
Family Life
Rutgers University Press seized the opportunity. With a growing
number of states adopting comprehensive-sex-education mandates, and with
the 595 school districts of New Jersey seeking to meet their state
mandate, the market for a sex primer looked promising. The press set out
to fill that market niche. It assembled a small, sympathetic advisory
panel, including Susan Wilson, and then hired Barbara Sprung, an
independent consultant from New York City, to write its pathbreaking
sex-education text.
A graduate of Sarah Lawrence and the Bank Street College of
Education, Barbara Sprung spent eight years as an elementary school
teacher before she embarked on a second career as a diversity-education
specialist. During the 1970s and the 1980s, working first for a feminist
organization and then for her own organization, Educational Equity
Concepts, Sprung produced books, teachers' guides, and other materials
based on a "nonsexist, multicultural, disability-sensitive, early
childhood approach." The Rutgers project was her first venture into
sex education.
With her advisers, she came up with Learning About Family Life, a
"textbook package" described in the Rutgers University Press
marketing brochure as a "pioneering" approach to family-life
education for schoolchildren in kindergarten through third grade. The
textbook also carries a pioneering price tag--$250 a package. As befits
a fundamental text, the curriculum sets forth its guiding principles:
"Sexuality is a part of daily living, as essential to normal
functioning as mathematics and reading." And as befits a primer, it
offers the sex basics. Here is a representative sampling:
On female genitalia: "The vulva is the area enclosing three
parts: a vagina, the opening you urinate from, and a clitoris. . . .
Clitoris is a small sensitive part that only girls have, and it
sometimes makes you feel good."
On sexual intercourse: "To have sex, the man and woman lie very
close to each other so that their bodies are touching. Usually it
happens in bed, and they don't have any clothes on. Together the woman
and man place the man's penis inside the woman's vagina, and while they
are loving each other, many sperm come from the testicles into the man's
penis. After a while, the sperm come through the little hole at the end
of the man's penis, and they swim up the vagina and meet the egg in the
fallopian tube."
On masturbation: "Grown-ups sometimes forget to tell children
that touching can also give people pleasure, especially when someone you
love touches you. And you can give yourself pleasure, too, and that's
okay. When you touch your own genitals, it's called masturbating."
On sex: "When you are older, you can decide if you want to have
sex. Most people do, because they like it and it's a very important way
of showing that we love someone."
These sex facts are presented in a particularly captivating form.
Unlike standard sex-education curricula, which are about as exciting to
read as an IRS Form 1040, Learning About Family Life tells a story. The
text follows a fictional class of primary school children and their
teachers, Ms. Ruiz and Mr. Martin, as they experience a series of family
events during the course of the school year. The teachers and children
are characters in a continuing saga, full of drama and incident. Primary
school teachers tell Sprung that children eagerly ask, "When are we
going to talk about those kids in Class 203 again?" Little wonder.
This is sex education packaged as Sesame Street.
Like Sesame Street, Learning About Family Life deals with the social
and family issues of the day. During the year Classroom 203 encounters
the following events: Ms. Ruiz's pregnancy and childbirth, the death of
Mr. Martin's father, the drug arrest of Martine's cousin, the birth of a
child to Joseph's teenage sister, the arrival of Natan's grandmother
from Russia, Sarah's trip to see her divorced father, and the visit of
Seth's HIV-infected uncle. These events and others, presented in
forty-three vignettes, provide an occasion for straight talk about
genitalia, sexual intercourse, pregnancy and childbirth, HIV and AIDS,
masturbation, sexual abuse, physical disability, drug abuse, death,
divorce, grandparents, and all kinds of families.
As they read about Classroom 203, children acquire a scientific sex
vocabulary. "Adults in the children's families probably don't use
accurate terms like anus and buttocks," the teachers' resource
guide warns. "You, as the teacher, are the best role model for
creating comfort." Indeed, the teacher is to insist on replacing
even words that are perfectly apt for a six-year-old's vocabulary with
more-scientific terms. In a lesson on pregnancy, Brian talks about how
his mother's tummy felt when the baby was growing inside. Ms. Ruiz says,
"I know we are used to saying baby and tummy. But fetus and uterus
are more accurate words." And when it comes to a hot issue like
masturbation, a teacher's cool command of the facts is crucial:
"Masturbation is a topic that is viewed negatively in many
families, based on long-standing cultural and religious teachings.
Assure parents that your approach will be low keyed and will stress
privacy, but also make it clear that you will not perpetuate myths that
can mar children's healthy sexual development." Teachers must also
debunk the myth that masturbation is only for boys. Girls must be
granted equal time to ask masturbation questions.
If girls need nudging in the sex department, boys need coaxing in the
emotions department. Indeed, one of the strongest themes in the text is
the problematic nature of boys. Boys are emotionally clogged, unable to
cry or to express feelings. And little boys may enter grade school with
the idea that such sex-related matters as pregnancy, childbearing, and
baby care are only for girls. Therefore Learning About Family Life
enlists boys in nurturing and "feelings" activities. These may
be difficult for boys who come from macho backgrounds. But here again
the school provides a cultural haven. If the lessons in nurturing
conflict with a boy's family or cultural teachings, the teachers' manual
advises, the teacher should say, "In school, talking about feelings
is a part of learning."
In early sex education feelings talk and sex talk are closely related
for good reason: little schoolchildren do not have the capacity to
understand big adult issues directly. But many are now exposed to big
adult issues at an early age, and so it is necessary to find routes to
understanding. Early sex education thus turns to affective pathways and
to a therapeutic pedagogy.
Stuff Happens
According to its publishers, Learning About Family Life provides a
realistic slice of contemporary family life. Nonetheless, it is a highly
selective slice. There is a vignette designed to expose children to an
"amicable divorce." But there is no corresponding vignette to
give children a picture of an amicable, much less a long lasting,
marriage. (Susan Wilson believes that you "can't beat kids all over
the head" with marriage.) There is a story about sex as a way to
show love, but no story about commitment as a way to show love. There is
an effort to give children positive messages about expressing sexuality,
but no effort to give children positive messages about the advantages of
not expressing sexuality before they are grown. And this family world is
only thinly populated by men. Ms. Ruiz is a well-defined character in
the story; the male teacher, Mr. Martin, is more of a bit player, taking
center stage in one story to talk about masturbation and in another to
cry. There are grandmothers but no grandfathers. A brand-new father
makes a cameo appearance to show off his nurturing skills, but the only
other father is divorced and a plane ride away.
Here is the dilemma: Learning About Family Life is caught between two
competing tendencies. On the one hand, it works hard to reflect the
real-life family circumstances of many children. It deals with some
hard-edged issues: sexual abuse, unwed teenage motherhood, drug dealing,
and divorce. On the other hand, it takes a deeply sentimental view of
these gritty realities. Consider, for example, the story "Joseph Is
an Uncle":
Joseph's seventeen-year-old sister has a new baby. She is not
married. The baby's father is gone. Joseph's parents are mad and sad at
the same time. His sister is tired and out of sorts. Yet things work
out. The family rallies round. An aunt takes care of the baby during the
day. Joseph's sister returns to school. Joseph shows the photograph of
his new nephew to his best friend, but he doesn't want anyone else to
know about his sister's baby. His friend encourages him to show the
photo to Mr. Martin and Ms. Ruiz.
Of all the sex tales, Joseph's story merits the closest attention.
Early sex education, after all, purports to help children avoid the fate
of Joseph's teenage sister. So what are we to make of this story? First,
though illegitimacy is not treated cavalierly, it is depicted as a
family crisis that is quickly resolved, because all the folks pitch in.
Apparently there are no longer-term consequences for Joseph's sister or
his little nephew--such as poverty, welfare dependency, or diminished
school and job prospects. Second, in a curriculum designed to teach
personal responsibility, the text misses an opportunity to do so. Unwed
teenage parenthood is not an affliction visited on people like
hurricanes or drought, yet that is the message of the story. Among the
families in Classroom 203 stuff happens.
Finally, think about the baby's father. Joseph's sister's boyfriend
has sex as an expression of love, exactly as the sex primer describes,
but then he takes off. Though Learning About Family Life has stern
messages for boys about caring and sharing, it ducks the basic question
of male responsibility. A seven-year-old boy listening to this story
might well conclude that illegitimacy is a girls' topic.
As it turns out, then, early sex education is not straight talk at
all but a series of object lessons. And these are offered not so much
with a nose for the facts as with an eye to the sex educators'
philosophy. Learning About Family Life is no less didactic in its views
on family life than Dick and Jane. To be sure, a truly fact-based
approach would have to deal with some hard truths. For example, it would
have to say that unwed teenage parenthood carries grave consequences for
teenagers and their babies; that not all families are equally capable of
caring for children; and that absent long-term commitment,
responsibility, and sacrifice, love does not conquer all. Since some
children grow up in broken or unwed teenage families, there is an
understandable concern that children not feel stigmatized by such facts.
Yet such tender concern raises a tough question: If the classroom is the
source of unbiased factual information, how can the problems of
illegitimacy and broken families be dealt with without touching on the
key facts in the matter?
The Pedagogy of Sex Education
In the middle grades sex education takes a more technical turn. At
eleven and twelve many young people are approaching the threshold of
puberty while others are already in full pubertal flower. (Today the
average age of menarche is twelve and a half.) Now, as hormones kick in,
children are ready to express themselves sexually. Thus the focus of sex
education shifts from sex literacy to building sexual skills. This is
when students must acquire the knowledge and technical skills to manage
their emerging sexuality.
Sex-education advocates agree that abstaining from sex is the best
way to avoid STDs and early pregnancy. But they reject an approach that
is limited to teaching abstinence. First, they say, abstinence-based
teaching ignores the growing number of adolescents who are already
sexually active at age twelve or thirteen. One Trenton schoolteacher
said to me, "How can I teach abstinence when there are three
pregnant girls sitting in my eighth-grade class?" Second,
abstinence overlooks the fact that, as Susan Wilson explains, "it
is developmentally appropriate for teenagers to learn to give and
receive pleasure."
Consequently, the New Jersey sex-education advocates call for
teaching middle-schoolers about condoms, abortion, and the advantages of
"protected" sex. But given the risks to teenagers, they are
not crazy about sexual intercourse either. Indeed, Wilson says,
Americans are fixated on "this narrow little thing called
intercourse." The alternative is a broad thing called noncoital sex
or, in the argot of advocates, "sexual expression without
risk."
Noncoital sex includes a range of behaviors, from deep kissing to
masturbation to mutual masturbation to full body massage. Since none of
these involves intercourse, sex educators see them as ways for teenagers
to explore their sexuality without harm or penalty. And from a broader
public-health perspective, risk-free sexual expression has great
potential. According to the Rutgers education professor William
Firestone, who conducted a study of sex-education teaching in New Jersey
for the Network for Family Life Education, noncoital sex offers
"real opportunities to reduce dangers to many teens who engage in
sexual behavior, despite recommendations for abstinence." Yet as
Firestone's survey research shows, many teachers shrink from this
approach. Wilson says, "We hardly ever talk to teens about necking
and petting and admiring your body and maybe massage."
As Wilson points out, noncoital sex is most practicable when
teenagers can communicate with each other. "A lot of people think
that once you start down the road to sex, you can't stop, and that's the
problem. But I think that by talking about these things and by role
playing, you give kids control and you give them the language to say
'That's enough--I don't want any more. I don't want to have
intercourse.'"
Since safe petting and good talking go together, middle school
students need to continue to practice their communication skills. But in
teaching these skills teachers cannot rely on old-fashioned didactic
methods. Middle school students are still short-term thinkers, reckless
in deed. Therefore sex education in middle school does not yet enter the
realm of thinking and ideas but remains lodged instead in the realm of
what one teacher calls "feelings and values."
"Hello, Vulva"
I attended a teacher-training conference sponsored by the Network for
Family Life Education to get acquainted with the way sex is taught. In
New Jersey, as in other states with mandates for comprehensive sex
education, such one-day workshops are a mainstay of teacher training.
For a small investment of time and money--a day out of the classroom and
$35--teachers learn the latest in sex-education theory and practice. On
the day I attended, the crowd was made up of physical-education, home
economics, and health teachers with a scattering of elementary school
nurses as well. Almost all were women.
Deborah Roffman, an independent sex-education consultant from
Maryland who teaches in several private middle and high schools, was the
keynote speaker. (Like Roffman, most of the trainers at this conference
came to it from the world of advocates, family planners, and private
consultants. Only one teaches in the public schools.) She was an
engaging speaker with the timing and phrasing of a good comedian.
(Teacher in audience: "What do you say when a student asks you to
define 'blow job'?" Roffman: "You say it is oral sex."
Pause. Roffman again: "But what if the student's next question is
'Does that mean you talk while you screw?'") To kick off the
conference, Roffman gave a rousing talk, urging teachers to adopt bolder
teaching methods. I was curious to see what she had in mind, so I
attended her workshop.
She began the workshop session with these instructions: "Turn to
the person next to you. Make eye contact. Say 'Hello, penis.' Shake
hands and return the greeting: 'Hello, vulva.'" This warmup
exercise underscores a central idea in sex pedagogy: for teachers no
less than for students, talking about sex provokes anxiety and
embarrassment. Such embarrassment stands in the way of good
communication, and good communication is crucial to responsible sexual
conduct.
So is emotional literacy. To become more emotionally articulate,
middle-schoolers engage in a series of feelings exercises. The purpose
is to help students "normalize" and share common growing-up
experiences. Roffman handed out a list of sample questions: "What
is the worst thing your parents could find out about a child of theirs
who is your age?" "Have you ever experienced the death of
someone close to you?" "What is a way in which your parents
are 'overprotective'?" In the middle schools as in the elementary
schools, there is a continuing effort to break down boys' emotional
reserve. Encourage your students to sit boy-girl, Roffman suggests, and
ask the biggest boy in the class the first feelings question.
The Consortium for Educational Equity, at Rutgers, offers a similar
set of feelings-and-values exercises in a sex curriculum designed for
seventh- and eighth-graders. Some are sentence-completion exercises. In
one, seventh-graders are asked to complete the sentence "If someone
loves me, they . . ." and then elsewhere to "compare their
ideas [about love] to [Eric] Fromm's and [Leo] Buscaglia's material on
love." In another, students are to "write a positive
self-statement . . .--'I am strong' . . . 'I am happy' . . ."--and
then discuss the "impact of positive self-statements on feelings of
self-esteem."
Other exercises draw on more therapeutic methods, such as
role-playing and small-group work. There are gender-reversal exercises,
in which girls and boys each play the role of the opposite sex. In small
groups students may brainstorm about ways to deal with an unwanted
pregnancy or come up with a list of their expectations of nonmarital
sex.
Some of the gender-reversal exercises sound like birthday-party
games. In one exercise, called the Fish-Bowl, girls are seated in a
circle in which there is one empty chair. Boys form a circle around the
girls. Girls talk about what they like and dislike about boys. If one of
the boys wishes to speak, he sits in the empty chair in the girls'
circle. After a time the boys repeat the exercise, with the girls in the
outer circle.
Because of its intimate subject matter, the feelings-and-values
classroom institutes a new code of classroom conduct. There are
confidentiality rules. Roffman's middle school students are told that
nothing said in sex-education class goes out of the class without
students' express permission. In discussions middle-schoolers must
protect the privacy of individuals who are not class members; except for
classmates', no names may be used. Another rule is that any student who
does not want to answer a question may pass. In some classes students
agree to use only "I" statements, rather than "you"
statements, in order to express their thoughts more positively.
In therapeutically oriented classrooms, moreover, the teacher assumes
the role of confidant and peer. Like students, teachers are encouraged
to share personal experiences. An idea book for New Jersey teachers,
published by the Network, tells the inspirational story of a high school
teacher who talks to his class about his vasectomy and how he feels
about it. Yet although they are advised to share experiences, teachers
are not to impose their opinions, even when it comes to arguably the
most important question: "What is the right time to begin having
sex?" The teacher is encouraged to turn the question back to the
students: "How would you begin to make that decision?"
Sex educators defend this approach with the language of empowerment.
Students, they say, must acquire the knowledge and skills to answer
these questions for themselves. After all, grown-ups aren't around to
supervise teenagers every minute of the day. Teachers can't follow
students home, and working parents can't check up on teenagers who are
home alone. Why not invest teenagers with the power to make wise choices
on their own?
Reality Tests
On its face, this new therapeutic sex pedagogy does not seem all that
therapeutic or all that new. Teenage girls have enjoyed self-inventory
tests at least as long as Seventeen magazine has been around. And
there's nothing particularly revolutionary about small-group discussions
of feelings and values. This, after all, is why teenagers invented the
slumber party.
But on second glance there is something radically new about
comprehensive sex education. As both a philosophy and a pedagogy, it is
rooted in a deeply technocratic understanding of teenage sexuality. It
assumes that once teenagers acquire a formal body of sex knowledge and
skills, along with the proper contraceptive technology, they will be
able to govern their own sexual behavior responsibly. In brief, what
comprehensive sex education envisions is a regime of teenage sexual
self-rule.
The sex educators offer their technocratic approach as an alternative
to what they see as a failed effort to regulate teenage sexuality
through social norms and religious values. Face facts. In a climate of
sexual freedom the old standard of sexual conduct for teenagers--a
standard separate from adult sexual standards--is breaking down.
Increasingly teenagers are playing by the same sexual rules as adults.
Therefore, why withhold from adolescents the information and
technologies that are available to adults?
To be sure, sex educators have a point. Traditional sexual morality,
along with the old codes of social conduct, is demonstrably less
effective today than it once was in governing teenage sexual conduct.
But although moral standards can exist even in the midst of a breakdown
of morality, a technocratic view cannot be sustained if the techniques
fizzle. Thus comprehensive sex education stands or falls on the proven
effectiveness of its techniques.
For a variety of reasons the body of research on sex-education
programs is not as rich and robust as we might wish. However, the
available evidence suggests that we must be skeptical of the
technocratic approach. First, comprehensive sex education places its
faith in the power of knowledge to change behavior. Yet the evidence
overwhelmingly suggests that sexual knowledge is only weakly related to
teenage sexual behavior. The researcher Douglas Kirby, of ETR
Associates, a nonprofit health-education firm in Santa Cruz, California,
has been studying sex-education programs for more than a decade. During
the 1980s he conducted a major study of the effectiveness of
sex-education programs for the Department of Health, Education and
Welfare, and he has since completed a review for the Centers for Disease
Control of all published research on school-based sex-education programs
designed to reduce the risks of unprotected sex. His research shows that
students who take sex education do know more about such matters as
menstruation, intercourse, contraception, pregnancy, and sexually
transmitted diseases than students who do not. (Thanks to federal
funding for AIDS education in the schools, students tend to be very
knowledgeable about the sources and prevention of HIV infection.)
But more accurate knowledge does not have a measurable impact on
sexual behavior. As it is typically taught, sex education has little
effect on teenagers' decisions to engage in or postpone sex. Nor,
according to Kirby, do knowledge-based sex-education programs
significantly reduce teenage pregnancy. And although teenagers who learn
about contraception may be more likely to use it, their contraceptive
practices tend to be irregular and therefore ultimately unreliable.
Comprehensive sex education assumes that knowledge acquired at
earlier ages will influence behavior. Yet the empirical evidence
suggests that younger teenagers, especially, are unlikely to act on what
they know. An analysis of a Planned Parenthood survey concludes that a
"knowledgeable thirteen-year-old is no more likely to use
contraceptives than is an uninformed thirteen-year-old." As Kirby
puts it, "Ignorance is not the solution, but knowledge is not
enough."
If knowledge isn't enough, what about knowledge combined with
communication skills? Sex education does appear to diminish teenagers'
shyness about discussing sexual matters. One study shows that girls who
have had sex education may be more likely to talk about sex with their
parents than those who have not. Since talking with their mothers about
sex may help some girls avoid pregnancy, this is a mildly positive
effect. There does not seem to be a parallel effect for boys, however.
Overall, parent-child communication is far less important in
influencing sexual behavior than parental discipline and supervision.
One study, based on teenagers' own reports of levels of parental
control, shows that teenagers with moderately strict parents had the
lowest level of sexual activity, whereas teens with very strict parents
had higher levels, and those with very permissive parents had the
highest levels. Moreover, there is a strong empirical relationship
between diminished parental supervision and early sexual activity.
In boy-girl communication, girls say that they want help in rejecting
boys' sexual overtures. In a survey taken in the mid-1980s, 1,000
teenage girls aged sixteen and younger were asked to select from a list
of more than twenty sex-related topics those areas where they would like
more information and help. The girls were most likely to say they wanted
more information on how to say no without hurting boys' feelings. This
is especially noteworthy given that all the girls in the survey were
sexually active, and some were mothers.
Beyond "no," better communication about sex does not seem
to contribute to higher levels of sexual responsibility. To be sure,
there has been little research into this aspect of teenage sexuality.
But even absent research, there is good reason to be skeptical of the
claim. If free and easy sex talk were a key determinant of sexual
behavior, then we might expect the trends to look very different. It
would be our tongue-tied grandparents who had high rates of illegitimacy
and STDs, not today's franker and looser-lipped teenagers.
"You Are Not Ready for Sex"
Unsurprisingly, there is not a shred of evidence to support the claim
that noncoital sex, with or without communication, will reduce the
likelihood of coitus. William Firestone, of Rutgers, who wrote the study
for the Network for Family Life Education, concedes that his enthusiasm
is empirically unfounded. In fact, several studies show just the
opposite. Outercourse is a precursor of intercourse. But do we need
studies to tell us this? Is it not graven in our memory that getting to
third base vastly increases the chances of scoring a run? In fact, it
could be argued that teaching noncoital sex techniques as a way of
reducing the risks of coitus comes close to educational malpractice.
And what about empowering students to make their own sexual
decisions? Douglas Kirby's work shows that teaching decision-making
skills is not effective, either, in influencing teenage sexual behavior.
Similarly, there is little empirical support for the claim made by
comprehensive sex education's advocates that responsible sexual behavior
depends on long years of sexual schooling. In fact, the evidence points
in the opposite direction. Math and reading do require instruction over
a period of time, but sex education may be most effective at a key
developmental moment. This is not in grade school but in middle school,
when pre-teens are hormonally gearing up for sex but are still mainly
uninitiated.
In pursuit of a more effective sex pedagogy, researchers have turned
away from technocratic approaches and dusted off that old chestnut,
norms. According to Kirby's research review, several new and promising
sex-education programs focus on sending clear messages about what is
desirable behavior. When middle-schoolers ask "What is the best
time to begin having sex?" teachers in these programs have an
answer. It is "Not yet. You are not ready for sex."
Evidently, too, sex education works best when it combines clear
messages about behavior with strong moral and logistical support for the
behavior sought. One of the most carefully designed and evaluated
sex-education courses available is Postponing Sexual Involvement, a
program developed by researchers at Grady Memorial Hospital, in Atlanta,
Georgia, and originally targeted at minority eighth graders who are at
high risk for unwed motherhood and sexually transmitted diseases. Its
goal is to help boys and girls resist pressures to engage in sex.
The Grady Hospital program offers more than a "Just say no"
message. It reinforces the message by having young people practice the
desired behavior. The classes are led by popular older teenagers who
teach middle-schoolers how to reject sexual advances and refuse sexual
intercourse. The eighth-graders perform skits in which they practice
refusals. Some of them take the part of "angel on my
shoulder," intervening with advice and support if the sexually
beleaguered student runs out of ideas. Boys practice resisting pressure
from other boys. According to the program evaluator, Marion Howard, a
professor of gynecology and obstetrics at Emory University, the skits
are not like conventional "role plays," in which students are
allowed to come up with their own endings. All skits must end with a
successful rebuff.
The program is short: five class periods. It is not comprehensive but
is focused on a single goal. It is not therapeutic but normative. It
establishes and reinforces a socially desirable behavior. And it has had
encouraging results. By the end of ninth grade only 24 percent in the
program group had had sexual intercourse, as compared with 39 percent in
the nonprogram group. Studies of similar programs show similar results:
abstinence messages can help students put off sex. It is noteworthy that
although the purpose of the Grady Hospital program was to help students
postpone sex, it also had an impact on the behavior of students who
later engaged in sexual intercourse. Among those who had sex, half used
contraception, whereas only a third did in a control group that had not
taken the course.
Postponing Sexual Involvement and similarly designed sex-education
programs offer this useful insight: formal sex education is perhaps most
successful when it reinforces the behavior of abstinence among young
adolescents who are practicing that behavior. Its effectiveness
diminishes significantly when the goal is to influence the behavior of
teenagers who are already engaging in sex. Thus teaching sexually active
middle school students to engage in protected intercourse is likely to
be more difficult and less successful than teaching abstinent students
to continue refraining from sex. This seems to hold for older teens as
well. In a 1991 study Kirby points to one curriculum for tenth-graders,
Reducing the Risk, which has been successful in increasing the
likelihood that abstinent students will continue to postpone sex over
the eighteen months following the course. However, although the program
emphasizes contraception as well as sexual postponement, it does not
increase the likelihood that already sexually active tenth-graders will
engage in protected sex. "Once patterns of sexual intercourse and
contraceptive use are established," Kirby writes, "they may be
difficult to change." For that reason the Grady Hospital
researchers have developed a program for sixth-graders, since 44 percent
of the boys taking their course in the eighth grade were already
sexually experienced (this was true of just nine percent of the girls).
It does not follow, however, that this approach will work for younger
children. The evidence strongly suggests that children who are
sexualized at very early ages are likely to be victims of sexual abuse
and other forms of traumatic sexualization. Teaching refusal skills to a
"sexually active" nine- or ten-year-old is not the answer.
Such children need far more intensive care and support than can be
provided in the classroom.
In a sharp break with the Surgeon General's approach, President
Clinton's welfare-reform proposal strongly endorses the Grady Hospital
approach. Similarly, the President's recent bully-pulpit message to
teenagers, counseling sexual postponement and marriage before
parenthood, is strikingly at odds with the Surgeon General's message to
"get real." Thus the Administration finds itself in the
awkward position of advancing contradictory approaches to sex education
and pregnancy prevention.
Judging by the available evidence, the President has the stronger
case. None of the technocratic assumptions of comprehensive sex
education hold up under scrutiny. Research does not support the idea
that early sex education will lead to more-responsible sexual behavior
in adolescence. Nor is there reason to believe that franker
communication will reduce the risks of early-teenage sex. Nor does
instruction about feelings or decision-making seem to have any
measurable impact on sexual conduct. Teaching teenagers to explore their
sexuality through noncoital techniques has perverse effects, since it is
likely to lead to coitus. Finally, although teenagers may be sexually
miseducated, there is no reason to believe that miseducation is the
principal source of sexual misbehavior. As we will see, the most
important influences on teenage sexual behavior lie elsewhere.
Moreover, if comprehensive sex education has had a significant impact
on teenage sexual behavior in New Jersey, there is little evidence to
show it. The advocates cannot point to any evaluative studies of
comprehensive sex education in the state. Absent such specific measures,
one can only fall back on gross measures like the glum statistics on
unwed teenage childbearing in the state. In 1980, 67.6 percent of
teenage births were to unmarried mothers; eleven years later the figure
had increased to 84 percent. Arguably, the percentage might be even
higher if comprehensive sex education did not exist. Nevertheless, it is
hard for advocates to claim that the state with the nation's fourth
highest percentage of unwed teenage births is a showcase for their
approach.
The absence of empirical support for comprehensive sex education does
not, however, discomfit or deter its advocates. Up and down the
sex-education ranks, from the Surgeon General to local advocates, there
has been little effort to make a reasoned case for comprehensive sex
education. Challenged, the sex educators simply crank up their rhetoric:
Criticize sex education, they say, and you contribute to the deaths of
teenagers from AIDS.
Nor, for that matter, has there been much critical challenge from the
research community. Perhaps this is because comprehensive sex education
is a policy crafted outside the precincts of the academy. It is not
rooted in a single discipline, or even a set of disciplines, but can
best be described as a jumble of popular therapies and philosophies,
including self-help therapies, self-esteem and assertiveness training,
sexology, and certain strands of feminism.
The unifying core of comprehensive sex education is not intellectual
but ideological. Its mission is to defend and extend the freedoms of the
sexual revolution, and its architects are called forth from a variety of
pursuits to advance this cause. At least in New Jersey, the
sex-education leaders are not researchers or policy analysts or child
development experts but public-sector entrepreneurs: advocates,
independent consultants, family planners, freelance curriculum writers,
specialty publishers, and diversity educators. However dedicated and
high-minded they may be, their principal task is not to serve the public
or schoolchildren but to promote their ideology.
For better or worse, sex-education advocacy is largely women's work.
And there is an unmistakably female bias in the advocates' idea of what
is sexually nice. It favors what thousands of American women have told
Ann Landers: in their sex lives women would like more talking, more
hugging, more outercourse. At the teacher-training workshop I attended,
a family planner explained a classroom exercise designed to show all the
things we can do without sexual intercourse: we can have children; we
can show love and affection; we can gain self-esteem; we can achieve
success in life. Reaching her summation, she proclaimed, We can have
orgasm without sexual intercourse. After a moment, in the back of the
classroom, one of the few men attending cleared his throat and politely
protested this ideal of intercourse-free sex.
Comprehensive sex education reflects not just a gender bias but also
a generational bias. Despite its verbal swagger, it offers a misty-eyed
view of early-teenage sexuality. It assumes that the principal obstacles
to responsible sexual conduct are ignorance, guilt, and shame. Once
properly schooled in sex and freed of these repressive feelings, boys
and girls can engage in mutual sexual pleasuring. But there is a dated
quality to this view. Indeed, many of the arguments for sex education
are filled with anecdotes from the fifties: Susan Wilson, for one, urges
middle-aged teachers to think back and remember how inadequate their own
sex education was. Though the educators' notions may accurately reflect
what it was like for eighteen-year-old females to come of age before the
sexual revolution of the 1960s, they have little to do with what
fifteen-year-olds face in the 1990s. The MTV generation may indeed have
a distorted image of sex, but it has not been distorted by shame or
repression.
Thus comprehensive sex education flunks the reality test not just
once but twice. Indeed, much of the evidence suggests that
less-comprehensive, more-targeted sex education would be far more
effective in reducing early sexual involvement and its associated risks.
But more important, comprehensive sex education is woefully out of touch
with the realities of teenagers' sex lives. Surely any policy with
claims to steely-eyed realism must begin with an appraisal of what the
evidence tells us about the sexual lives of today's adolescents,
especially teenage girls.
The New Sexual Revolution
There is a new sexual revolution in America. Unlike the old sexual
revolution, which has been documented and celebrated ever since its
boisterous beginnings, in the late 1960s, the new sexual revolution has
arrived unheralded. Its vanguard is found not among confident,
self-dramatizing students on college campuses but among gawky
adolescents in the crowded hallways of the junior high.
The children of the Baby Boom generation are beginning to have sex at
earlier ages than their parents did. In 1970, five percent of
fifteen-year-old girls and 32 percent of seventeen-year-old girls
reported having had sex; by 1988 the figures had increased to 26 percent
of fifteen-year-olds and 51 percent of seventeen-year-olds. By age
nineteen nearly 80 percent of young women have had sexual intercourse.
As a result of earlier sexual initiation among girls, the historical
gender gap in first sexual experience is narrowing; according to the
1988 National Survey of Young Men, one third of teenage males have had
sex by age fifteen, and 86 percent by age nineteen. With early
initiation, today's adolescents are more sexually active. They have more
partners: among never-married sexually experienced teenage girls in
1971, 38 percent had had two or more sexual partners; by 1988 the figure
had increased to 59 percent. And they have sex more frequently: the 1988
National Survey of Family Growth reported that 45 percent of
never-married sexually active girls had intercourse at least once a
week, as compared with 40 percent when the survey was administered in
1982.
But these figures alone do not capture what may be the most striking
feature of the new sexual revolution: the rise in the proportion of
younger teenagers engaging in sex. The largest relative increase in
sexual intercourse among teenage girls has occurred among those fifteen
years of age, from 4.6 percent in 1970 to 25.6 percent in 1988. (Below
the age of fifteen, the evidence strongly suggests, sexual initiation is
involuntary for a large proportion of girls who report having had sexual
intercourse.)
Within this overall pattern of earlier sexual initiation there are
significant racial and ethnic differences. African-American males are
more likely than white or Hispanic males to engage in early sex. At age
fourteen, 35 percent of black males have had intercourse; the comparable
percentages for white and Hispanic males are seven and six respectively.
Apparently because they begin their sexual careers earlier, black males
also report more partners than white or Hispanic males (those who are
sexually active at age fifteen, for example, report 6.4, 3.5, and 1.9
respectively). Though data comparing teenage girls from all three groups
are not available, the evidence points to similar differences between
African-American and white females. African-American girls are more
likely to have had premarital sex in the early teen years than their
white counterparts. However, the differences become less pronounced
among older teens. For example, at age sixteen, 24 percent of white
girls, and 33 percent of black girls, report having experienced sexual
intercourse; by age nineteen the percentages are nearly identical: 76
percent of white girls and 79 percent of black girls.
Family structure strongly influences early sexual activity as well.
Daughters in single-parent families are more likely to engage in early
sex than girls who grow up in two-parent families. Several factors may
be involved: less supervision in the home, less exposure to adults'
sexuality, and the lack of a father's steady affection and protection.
Girls whose relationships with their fathers have been severely damaged
by divorce or their parents' nonmarriage are more likely to engage in a
frantic quest for male approval and to seek love through early sex than
are girls from intact families. Both parents and teenagers in divorced
families have more permissive attitudes toward sexual intercourse
outside marriage. In fact, there is evidence of a kind of sexual
trickle-down in families, not just from parent to child but also from
older siblings to younger. Teenagers with sexually active siblings are
likelier to begin having sex at an early age.
Religiously observant teens are likelier than others to refrain from
early sex; the highest level of premarital intercourse occurs among
teens with no religious affiliation. At the same time, the University of
Michigan sociologist Arland Thornton reports, cause and effect can work
in the other direction. Early sexual activity can dampen religious
ardor.
In the midst of this sexual upheaval one trend is quite clear: the
new sexual revolution has been a disaster for teenage girls. Even more
now than in the past, girls bear the heavy burdens and penalties of
nonconjugal sex. Early sexual initiation puts girls at increased risk
for sexually transmitted diseases. This is partly because teenagers who
are sexually active at an early age have more partners and partly
because young teenage girls are likely to have older, sexually
experienced partners. Some researchers also contend that teenage girls
are at greater risk for STDs than adult women because their cervical
lining is not yet fully mature and is therefore more vulnerable to
pathogens. Whatever their causes, STDs can lead to serious, sometimes
permanent, damage to the reproductive system, including infertility,
chronic pelvic pain, ectopic pregnancy, and cervical cancer.
And despite reported high levels of contraceptive use among
adolescents, teenage girls continue to get pregnant. A million teenage
girls each year find themselves pregnant. About 37 percent of teenage
pregnancies end in abortion and about 14 percent in miscarriage. Roughly
half of all these pregnancies result in childbirth, and since less than
10 percent of teenagers today give their babies up for adoption, teenage
childbearing commonly results in teenage motherhood--usually unwed
motherhood.
This fact constitutes one of the more perplexing aspects of the new
sexual revolution. Teenage girls have greater control over their
fertility today than they had in the past, and yet the percentage of
births to unwed mothers continues to rise, having already increased from
30 percent among teenagers in 1970 to nearly 70 percent in 1990. In some
cities in America 85 or 90 percent of all teenage births are to unwed
mothers. Twenty-five percent of all babies born to teenagers are not
first children. And the earlier a teenager begins her maternal career,
the more children she is likely to have.
Teenage childbearing on this scale has monumental social
consequences, both for the mothers and for their young children. In
fact, if one wanted to spawn a generation of vulnerable families, one
would seek to increase the number of families headed by fifteen- and
sixteen-year-old mothers. A single teenage mother is less likely to
complete high school or to be employed than her peers, and her child is
at greater risk than other children for a host of health and
developmental problems, and also for physical and sexual abuse. Both
mother and child are likely to experience poverty and its predictable
social consequence, chronic welfare dependency. If three risk factors
for poverty are present--teenage childbearing, failure to complete high
school, and nonmarriage--then it is all but inevitable that the mother
and her child will live in poverty: 79 percent of all children born to
mothers with those three risk factors are poor.
Exploitative Sex
Beyond these statistical measures researchers are beginning to piece
together a portrait of teenage sexuality in the 1990s. There is still
much to learn, but recent research tells us two things: first,
fifteen-year-old sex is riskier than eighteen-year-old sex; and second,
early-teenage sex is often exploitative sex. This evidence indicates
that few young teenagers are ready or able to engage in kinder, gentler
sex. In fact, sexual encounters between fifteen-year-olds are likely to
be nasty, brutish, and short.
To begin with, there are sharp polarities in the way male and female
teenagers approach sex. Despite changes in teenage sexual behavior, boys
and girls continue to view love and sex relationships in different ways.
Girls look for security, and boys seek adventure. Boys are after
variety, and girls want intimacy. The classic formulation still seems to
hold true: girls give sex in order to get love, and boys give love in
order to get sex. According to one study, more than 60 percent of
sexually experienced girls were going steady with or engaged to their
first sexual partners, whereas less than 40 percent of teenage boys had
their first sex with a steady or a fiancee. Boys were more than twice as
likely as girls to have had their first intercourse with someone they
had only recently met. As Freya Sonenstein, of the Urban Institute, and
her colleagues report, "A typical picture of an adolescent male's
year would be separate relationships with two partners, lasting a few
months each."
Such gender polarities are most pronounced in early adolescence. Boys
and girls both experience physical changes during puberty, but these
changes carry different psychological meanings. For boys, increases in
body weight and size bring an enhanced sense of power and dominance,
whereas similar changes frequently provoke ambivalence and anxiety among
girls. In a culture obsessed with skeletal thinness as a standard of
female beauty and achievement, weight gain can inspire feelings of
"grossness" and self-disgust among teenage girls. Carol
Gilligan and other researchers have noted a decline in young adolescent
girls' feelings of competence and confidence at roughly the same time
that adolescent boys are becoming more assertive and, well, cocky.
The younger a girl is when she begins to have sex, the more
vulnerable she is to its risks. She is less likely than an older
teenager to be in a steady relationship, to plan her first intercourse,
or to use contraception. Thus girls who were fifteen or younger at first
intercourse are almost twice as likely as eighteen-year-olds to
experience pregnancy within the first six months of sexual activity. Nor
can it be said that a fifteen-year-old girl really chooses to engage in
sex, given the enormous gap between physical readiness on the one hand,
and emotional and cognitive readiness on the other. On this point Laurie
Schwab Zabin, a researcher at Johns Hopkins University, writes,
"Whether or not to engage in coitus, whether or not to contracept,
whether or not to bear a child when faced with an unintended
conception--are all decisions. Unfortunately, they are often not true
'choices.'" David Ellwood, the assistant secretary of Health and
Human Services, puts it even more plainly: "There seems to be ample
evidence to support almost any model of teenage behavior except a model
of pure rational choice."
Girls who are sexually active at early ages are likely to experience
coercive sex. Teenage girls tend to have first sex with male partners
who are three or more years older, whereas teenage boys are likely to
have their first sexual encounter with girls who are less than a year
older. Thus the balance of power is dramatically skewed. Surely one has
to be skeptical of claims of "voluntary" sex between girls and
much older partners. As one researcher put it, "Could one possibly
call the pairings of eleven-year-old girls and twenty-five-year-old men
'dates'?"
Indeed, age disparities between girls and their sexual partners are
often markers for sexual abuse. In one study of abused teenage mothers
and mothers-to-be, only 18 percent of the girls reported abuse by men
near their age, while 46 percent reported abuse by men ten or more years
older. Sexual abuse is a significant factor in girls' early
sexualization. Studies show that teenage girls who have been sexually
abused are significantly more likely to engage in voluntary sexual
intercourse and are likely to have intercourse at an earlier age, to be
more sexually active, and to engage in a wider range of sexual
activities than girls who have not been abused.
Girls' sexual conduct, unlike that of boys, is governed less by
hormones than by social controls. But in a cultural climate of sexual
freedom, girls have lost much of their authority in boy-girl
relationships. Until quite recently girls organized, managed, and
regulated the social pursuits of their peer groups, with the strong
support of adults. In romantic relationships girls exercised their power
by withholding sex, keeping boys in the role of craven sexual
petitioners. At the same time, they moved their boyfriends in the
direction of commitment and monogamy. "Going steady," the
ultimate romantic achievement for teenage girls, offered a
pseudomarriage that might include parceling out some of the sexual
favors of marriage. Of course, this system was seriously flawed. In the
intimacy of a steady relationship, girls could lose control, "give
in," and go all the way. Then they had to deal with the dire
consequences of their sexual transgression--a guilty conscience, a
ruined reputation, and sometimes an unwanted pregnancy.
The sexual revolution overturned this system of social controls by
giving women technological control over their fertility. Its emblematic
moment came when college health services began providing birth-control
pills to eighteen- and nineteen-year-old women. Liberated from many of
the penalties of premarital sex and the burdens of a sexual double
standard, women were able to behave like men in their sexual pursuits.
Yet although a single standard for men and women promised greater
honesty and equity in relationships, it tilted away from women's goals
of intimacy and commitment in the direction of what one sociologist has
aptly called sexual "freedom with a male bias": no holds
barred and no strings attached. (A nosy mother, I once asked my
college-age daughter if there were any differences in the way young men
and women conducted their sex lives on campus. "Only that girls
wait for a phone call the next day," she said.)
In the 1980s, with the advent of AIDS, the condom, an all-purpose
contraceptive, gained new favor. As an appurtenance of the sexual
culture, the condom led to a second shift in the control of sexuality:
it brought back protection with a male bias. Although pressure to engage
in early sex did not diminish, teenage girls' ability to protect
themselves did. One of the great ironies of the new sexual revolution is
that having won the "right" and the freedom to engage in sex
at an early age, girls must resort to some of the old wiles and cajolery
to get their male partners to use protection. Although girls may carry
Trojans in their purse, as the Surgeon General urges, they cannot wear
them.
The Lure of Motherhood
Recent thinking about unwed teenage pregnancy has focused on the
links between teenage motherhood and the economic incentives of the
welfare system. Charles Murray and others argue that poor teenagers
choose motherhood because it offers economic rewards such as health
care, day care, and an apartment of one's own. Yet some of the most
compelling research on unwed childbearing among poor teenagers suggests
that the strongest incentives for early teenage motherhood may be
psychological rather than economic. As Judith Musick argues in her book
Young, Poor and Pregnant, early pregnancy and childbearing must be
understood as a response to the developmental demands of adolescence.
According to Musick, whose research is based on her work as a
developmental psychologist and her six years as the director of the
Ounce of Prevention Fund, a public-private venture that runs
pregnancy-prevention and teenage-parent programs in Illinois, many of
the girls most at risk for unwed motherhood grow up without adequate
nurturance and protection. Some experience early and traumatic
sexualization in households where they are left in the care of their
mothers' boyfriends or other "play daddies." Thus the
emotional lives of many of the most vulnerable girls are defined by
"repeated experiences of personal harm at the hands of those who
should be their protectors."
As these girls become teenagers, they bring limited inner resources
to the key developmental task of adolescence: the formation of a stable
identity. Whereas a more resilient teenager is ready to face the classic
questions of adolescence--Who am I? and What will I do with my life? and
How will I be different from my mother?--the fragile girl may still be
wrestling with questions associated with an earlier developmental stage:
Who cares about me? and Whom can I depend on? and Where can I find
safety and security?
Through pregnancy and early childbearing a young woman finds a way to
reconcile her contradictory needs for autonomy and security. She may be
able to draw closer to her mother and to place a claim on maternal
affection, albeit indirectly, through a grandchild. And she may even
gain the fleeting attention of a wayward boyfriend or a faraway father.
Thus early sexual activity and maternity offer a way to retrieve
childhood and enter adulthood simultaneously.
Not to be ignored in this developmental drama are the universal
satisfactions of motherhood itself. If most new mothers are thrilled
with their infants, why would young girls not feel a surge of ecstatic
fulfillment? And if mothers everywhere enjoy dressing and showing off
their newborns, why would a teenage mother not derive maternal pleasures
from such activities? For a disadvantaged girl with few outlets to
express herself, exhibit her talents, or win recognition, becoming a
mother is a way to be fussed over and admired.
Reinforcing the immediate benefits of maternity are the psychological
costs of postponing sex and motherhood. Within the peer group as well as
the family, going to school and doing homework can be far less appealing
than showing off a baby, particularly if a girl's older sisters and
friends have babies of their own. Moreover, as Judith Musick explains,
pursuing a dream that does not include early motherhood involves a
painful and radical kind of split from mothers and other influential
women in a girl's life. So threatening is this separation that many
teenage girls on the threshold of change--enrolling in
high-school-equivalency classes, completing a job-training program,
breaking off with a violent boyfriend--fall back into an abusive
relationship, get pregnant a second time, or go back to an old drug
habit.
Thus changes in economic incentives, however politically attractive,
may not be enough to reduce unwed teenage childbearing. It may be
necessary to alter the psychological-incentive structure as well,
including "prettifying" the unglamorous business of going to
school, doing homework, and earning respectable grades. The process may
also include fostering strong relationships with adult women mentors who
can exercise firm guidance and give direction as well as support.
Finally, it may require some imaginative measures to "uglify"
unwed teenage motherhood or even to re-establish some of the
disincentives that worked in the past, including separation of the girl
from her peer group. Perhaps teenage mothers should attend special high
schools, as they do in some cities, rather than mixing with the general
high school population. This contemporary version of being "sent
away"--though it would not interrupt education--would segregate
teenage mothers from nonpregnant teenagers and perhaps change a peer
culture that views schoolgirl pregnancy as an unobjectionable, even
enviable, event.
The Retreat From Adolescence
Adolescence is a modern social invention, designed to deal with a
modern problem: the lengthening period between biological and social
maturity. Earlier in the nation's history girls entered puberty and left
school at about the same time--around age fifteen or sixteen. Although
most young women waited another five or six years before marrying, they
continued to live at home; teenage marriages were not common until the
1950s. By the beginning of this century, however, the age of menarche
was declining and the period of formal schooling was lengthening. At the
same time, parents, churches, and schools were relaxing their close
supervision of young women. Many young people were living in cities,
where the seductive attractions of the street, the saloon, and the dance
hall replaced the more wholesome pastimes of rural life. Under these new
social conditions youthful risk-taking became perilous, its penalties
more severe.
As a social invention, therefore, adolescence represented a clear
effort to define, order, and regulate a life stage that was becoming
socially chaotic. Among other things, adolescence provided institutional
reinforcement for the moratorium on youthful sexual activity, giving
young people the opportunity to acquire the competencies and credentials
of adulthood before they took on the responsibilities of marriage and
parenthood.
In the past decade or so, however, a new way of thinking about
teenage sexuality has emerged. It, too, recognizes the gap between
biological and social maturity, but responds with a different set of
controls. The new approach contends that teenagers should be expected to
express themselves sexually as part of their normal growing up, but
should be able to do so protected from the risks of early sexual
activity. The way to protect teenagers is to give them the interpersonal
skills and the technical tools to manage their own sexuality.
These competing traditions assign radically different
responsibilities to adults. In the classic model, adults are the
custodians of the moratorium. They secure and maintain this special life
stage by establishing familial and institutional controls over teenage
sexuality. Indeed, this approach requires some measure of sexual
restraint, or at least discretion, on the part of adults in order to set
an example. In the contemporary model, adults have a more limited
responsibility. Their job is to train teenagers in the management of
their own sexuality and to provide access to contraceptives. In the new
technocracy adults are called upon to staff teenagers in their sexual
pursuits while teenagers themselves are left to decide whether or not to
engage in sex. Refusing sex, no less than having sex, becomes a matter
of following individual dictates rather than following socially
instituted and culturally enforced norms.
One can, of course, imagine a creative synthesis of the two models: a
little more freedom for the kids, a little less supervision from busy
grown-ups. But this is not what has happened. In the past decade the
technocratic approach has gained ground while the classic approach has
steadily lost it. This has brought about a corresponding shift in adult
responsibility. Increasingly the litmus test of adult concern is one of
access: will grown-ups give teenagers the skills and tools to manage
their sex lives? Seen in the broader historical context, two seemingly
opposing responses to teenage sex--handing out condoms and teaching
refusal skills--reflect the same trend toward technocratic solutions and
diminished adult responsibility.
There has been a similar shift in public concerns. For most of this
century the debate over youthful well-being covered a broad social
terrain. The deliberations of the decennial White House Conference on
Children, which began in 1909 and ended in the early 1970s, ranged
widely from improving health and schooling to building character and
citizenship. Today public ambitions and public concern for adolescents'
well-being are narrower. Attention has turned to the task of managing
the collapse of the moratorium. As a consequence, the entire public
debate on the nation's youth has come down to a few questions. How do we
keep boys from killing? How do we keep girls from having babies? How do
we limit the social havoc caused by adolescent acting out?
There has been, as well, a shift in the notion of responsibility
among health and school professionals. As an idea, adolescence is
closely identified with the work of the American psychologist G. Stanley
Hall. But it was a liberal reform coalition of school, health, and
social-work professionals that took the idea of adolescence and
translated it into a set of new institutions designed to protect
vulnerable city youth from the burdens and responsibilities of too-early
adulthood. The juvenile justice system, the youth center, and
child-labor laws are all part of that institutional legacy. This
coalition also fought hard for sex education in the schools. But today a
similar liberal coalition is turning its back on that larger legacy.
The health and school establishments did not create the problems
associated with teenage sex. Thus it is impossible not to view their
response to these problems with a measure of sympathy. On the front
lines of the new sexual revolution, overwhelmed by the clinical evidence
of breakdown--thirteen-year-olds with gonorrhea, sixteen-year-olds
giving birth for the third time--the youth-serving professionals respond
with the tools of the clinic. At the same time, they seem to have lost
sight of the meaning and purpose of adolescence and of their own
historical role in creating and sustaining it.
Despite its confident assertions, comprehensive sex education
implicitly acknowledges a lifting of the moratorium and a return to a
more Darwinian sexual environment. What sex educators are offering now
is training in sexual survival. Once the kids have been equipped with
refusal skills, a bottle of body oil, and some condoms,
"reality-based" advocates send them into the world to fend for
themselves. Perhaps that is the best protection that today's school and
health leaders are able to offer from a harsh and predacious sexual
environment. But it is not realism. It is retreat.
Barbara Dafoe Whitehead is a vice-president of the Institute for
American Values, in New York City. She is at work on a book about
parents and children in a post marriage society.
Copyright © 1994 by The Atlantic Monthly Company.
All rights reserved.
The Atlantic Monthly; October 1994; The Failure of Sex Education.