Bill is a recovering alcoholic and experimented with marijuana, LSD, and other drugs when he was in college. As the parent of a 13- year-old daughter and 15- year-old son, he was in a bind. On one hand, he wanted to have frank, open, and honest discussions with his children about drugs, but on the other hand, he was afraid his children might take his experiences to mean they could use drugs when they were young and still be happy, productive adults. He was also afraid of being cast as a hypocrite.
"My kids will be the first ones to call me on anything if I don't follow through. They know I expect them to be upfront and honest with me, and they expect the same in return. I've always told them smoking and using drugs were bad as they were growing up, but when they hit the teen years, you need to be more specific. You have to be able to counter all the pressures they face to use drugs."
Bill decided that avoiding the subject would not help his children and that they could benefit from his mistakes.
"It wasn't an easy conversation at first," says Bill. "But I made it clear
that I did not want them to use alcohol, tobacco, or any other substances. I told them that I had made bad choices when I was younger, and told them how I am still paying for those choices today. I read up on some of the latest drugs and then told them about the very real dangers they faced if they used them—including what their mother and I would do if we ever found out!
"The fact that I have a pretty good relationship with my kids to begin with definitely made the discussion a lot easier. And, this is by no means a oneshot deal. There are probably a hundred opportunities each day to reinforce to them that they have better things to do than drugs. I plan to make the most of them."
